Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
my sisters under your porch take her home
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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