Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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