im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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