You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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