If i come over, it means nothing
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize