I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
