do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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