Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Life is so much better after having sex.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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