Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
