after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
