My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
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