The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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