I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Randomize
