ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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