i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
