you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
