Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
