i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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