So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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