Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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