Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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