okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize