my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Terrible idea I love it
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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