Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize