Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
my phone needs a breathalizer
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Still dying that you shit outside
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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