I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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