just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
