lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
