i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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