if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
