I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
