I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
