Sry I called you an 8
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize