I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
