i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
