marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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