I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
