i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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