New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize