Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Randomize