you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize