Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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