I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
