She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just want to make out with him forever
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
