Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
there was a trapeze. enough said
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
