What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
