i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Randomize
