So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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