you turned your livingroom into a bong?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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