They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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